Waterworld 2 Cancelled Due to Calgary’s Water Crisis
In a disappointing turn of events, the highly anticipated sequel to the cult classic “Waterworld” has been cancelled. “Waterworld 2” was scheduled to begin…
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Uncategorized
Calgary Asks Citizens to Donate Hoses for the ‘Steal Water from Edmonton’ Project
In a bold and creative move to address the ongoing water crisis, Calgary city water planners have launched the “Steal Water from Edmonton” project.…
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Blame the Mob
Salt Bans Enforced in Calgary: RCMP Cracks Down on Thirst-Inducing Foods
In response to Calgary’s ongoing water crisis, city officials have announced a controversial new measure: the banning of salt and salty foods. The reasoning…
Calgary Declares Magical Emergency: Wizards Weigh In on Water Crisis
The City of Calgary has declared a state of local emergency to deal with the ongoing water crisis caused by the catastrophic break in…
Give the Gift of Water This Father’s Day
With Father’s Day here and Calgary’s water crisis in full swing, finding the perfect last-minute gift for dad can be a challenge. But fear…
Shipment of Moles to Help Calgarians Dig for Underground Water Supplies
Big News coming to Calgary In an innovative yet unconventional effort to address Calgary’s ongoing water crisis, the city has announced the arrival of…
City of Calgary Files Lawsuit Against God for Violating Water Restrictions
In an unprecedented legal move, the City of Calgary has filed a lawsuit against God for violating outdoor water restrictions by making it rain.…
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DIY Projects
DIY: Repurposing Old Water Bottles into Bicycles
In an effort to promote sustainability and creativity, here’s a fun and eco-friendly project: turning old water bottles into a functional bicycle! With the…
Calgary Enforces Mandatory Fire Ban and Prohibits “Hot” Clothing
In response to the dangerously dry conditions caused by the ongoing water crisis, Calgary officials have implemented a mandatory fire ban that includes some…
Embrace the Dirt: Calgary’s Newest Trend in Personal Hygiene
As Calgary’s water crisis deepens, innovative solutions are becoming essential. Today, I present to you a revolutionary method of staying clean while conserving water:…