Calgary Declares Magical Emergency: Wizards Weigh In on Water Crisis
The City of Calgary has declared a state of local emergency to deal with the ongoing water crisis caused by the catastrophic break in…
Category: Water Conservation
City of Calgary Files Lawsuit Against God for Violating Water Restrictions
In an unprecedented legal move, the City of Calgary has filed a lawsuit against God for violating outdoor water restrictions by making it rain.…
Embrace the Dirt: Calgary’s Newest Trend in Personal Hygiene
As Calgary’s water crisis deepens, innovative solutions are becoming essential. Today, I present to you a revolutionary method of staying clean while conserving water:…
Categories
Water Conservation
New Event at the Calgary Stampede: The Cowboy Thirst Challenge
In an attempt to add a new level of excitement to this year’s Calgary Stampede, and to help achieve water-net-zero in light of public…
Solving Calgary’s Water Crisis: Cheers to a New Dawn!
In the midst of Calgary’s ongoing water crisis, our fair city has come up with an innovative, if somewhat intoxicating, solution: drink alcohol instead…
Categories
Water Conservation
Shower Shenanigans: How to Sing Shorter Songs and Save Water
When it comes to conserving water, even the smallest changes in our daily routines can make a significant difference. One fun and effective way…
Categories
Water Conservation
Embracing Nature’s Bounty: The Morning Dew Solution
As Calgary faces unprecedented challenges in managing its water resources, it’s crucial for each of us to reevaluate our daily routines and find innovative…
Mayor Declares State of Local Emergency: Your Questions Answered
On Saturday morning, Mayor Jyoti declared a state of local emergency for the city of Calgary. Officials say the city will remain on restrictions…
Categories
Water Conservation
Daycares and Orphanages to Stop Providing Liquids to Kids
In a controversial new policy aimed at extreme water conservation, Calgary’s daycares and orphanages have announced that they will no longer provide liquids to…
Categories
Water Conservation
City Morgue to Dehydrate Corpses to Provide Water for Downtown Restaurants
In a move that is both shocking and innovative, the City of Calgary has announced that the city morgue will begin dehydrating corpses to…